he said i was weird because i want to have sex in public places.
i dont think thats weird i think thats fun
i forgot to tell you, he fell asleep outside my house again last night, but im weird
New rule: no balls on the kitchen counter.
Then she called me a home wrecking whore.
dont they live in a condo? that doesnt count.
not my fault hes the one that tried to cuddle after. said he wanted to spoon away the shame.
I was high fiving everyone. I even high fived with the wall for doing such a good job suporting the ceiling and keeping us alive.
I approve. Last time I was there, I left E's room to get a drink of water. Found M sitting on the kitchen counter in his boxers hammered and eating a banana. He proceeded to feed me the rest of his banana then went to bed with the lights on. You two will be great.
Dude, did you fall in a toilet on the way over here?
Was face down in one actually. Bars 2, Drew 0.
I try new drugs instead of new boys. That way you can't scold me about the importance of condoms
Crappy Mother's Day to you! Those of us who don't have children fill the void with hot sex, sleeping in, more sex, leisurely suntanning, foreign travel, overseas sex, paying cash for sports cars, watching TV, having sex on the floor in front of TV porn, lounging around the house, or whatever the hell we want.
I spy something regrettable...
Oh my god. Stop!! It was one time and I still can't believe it.
Her mom is a nurse who got called in to declare someone dead. Just got wing manned by a corpse.
We helped him hit the bowl to the point that he didn't even have to move
I can only get day drunk because of my medicine now, so... There's that
Jesus when did you leave my house? I found 2 bottles of wine, vodka, and a book with blow all over it wondering if I was read bedtime stories
We should form a club for all of us that have stabbed a sibling with a fork!
Randomize
