just saw a dude in a v-neck sweater on a bike drinking starbucks. way to feed the stereotypes white dude.
She walked in, looked at the bed, sniffed, sighed, and went to grab her cleaning supplies. I'd say she knows.
He came, while we were making out fully clothed. I'm going to write a book.
Just came out of my room at 8 AM to find 2 pounds of raw hamburger and a half eaten cake strewn across the hallway. And I'm not surprised at all.
I dont even remember coming home... All my stuff is strewn randomly around my apartment... And I woke up at 5 sitting propped up in my bed with just my arm in a shirt
On campus. Grown men in women's sexy bee costumes. Complete with legwarmers. This cannot be real life.
Teasing with taco bell is not funny. High or sober.
Like lay upon bear skin rugs, drink brandy and reminisce of the yesteryear's before a majestic fire place? Because those are my plans.
E drugging s springing. Ease dnt Kate. To t e. ess e I meant thou.
Let's get really high and wear fake mustaches and try not to laugh at each other...
How do you initiate sexting are u supposed to be like yo I'm peeing and eating a clif bar and texting and thinking about you naked all at the same time
Can rosie odonnell just not be a lesbian? Shes stressing me out, knowing we bat for the same team.
She just sent me a message. It's a poem, about eternal love, that she wrote, about us. Just because I took her home two nights - doesn't mean it's eternal love.
You are cut off. Your giant penis and crazy awesome sex is ruining my body...
People probably think I’m a fangirl bc I go to so many shows but it’s really bc I like fucking the tour manager
Randomize