the pool opens at 11. by 1115 the ambulance had been called.
A good Q tip ear swabbing is better than bad sex.
My hot female boss's cubical is right next to mine with a wall between us. Do you think it is too forward to make a glory hole in the wall?
The guy drove to our house at 6am to sell us weed. Now that's customer service.
only 75% of american men are circumcised...i guess this was bound to happen to me someday.
A total of 95 cents was stuck to my ass the next morning.
I heard him crying and I heard him listening to porn... I'm hoping to God they weren't at the same time.
I'm still drunk. it's summer. I just need a hot dog and an aspirin.
I'd like to believe that in some alternate universe we are living this wonderful lesbian life together..
First sex of the summer I'm winning 1-0
GET HOME NOW
Oh shit
The only word that describes how much hair I shaved off of my ass is "considerable".
Bjs and tacos. That's my life.
"Like what guy would respond to 'let's fuck. I've got bagels'??"
Taking body shots off hot Camren. Get here now.
I have booze and I wanna give you a bj. How can you be mad at me?
Randomize
