Wow so rude I was trying to have an orgy later but whatever
I think having sex with you would be a great treat for us
you guys got to bein so kosher and go with the flow
No, I can't hang out with Dave because he already has a girlfriend. The one with the tatoos of cherries on her "cherry." Yeah, she doesn't really make me feel spectacularly comfortable.
THEY JUST PLAYED KISS FROM A ROSE TONIGHT IS PERFECT
shouldn't i get a discount if shes pregnant?
Shaking her cervix like it's the hottest ticket around
They woke me up at 6am and made me drink a bottle pf champagne yelling "champagne breakfast!"
We just had to use a designated driver to get to night class.
I'm having horrible flashbacks of being groped by Pauly Shore.
I'm like the kid who wants his birthday and christmas equally. Every time I get one I want the other. Only I don't want holidays I want brothers
This girl just texted me asking me to drop her cheese. What the fuck for that mean?
We were just sitting together and this guy walks up to us and says, "you ladies are drinking too slow", puts a 5 dollar bill on the table and just leaves the bar. Helloooo Taco Bell
His baby mama found the pictures of us, she couldn't see my face but she could see my asshole. So I'm safe.
I'm not trying to take your husband away from you, but can we have another 3way soon? I'm just desperate for good dick.
Also I've accepted I am not going to be a catch today. I look like a dead hooker and the remedial work is going to be patchy at best with the shakes I've got.
I'm like a hairless cat ready to be ravished
Randomize
