I DON'T KNOW WHERE WE ARE WE ARE TOO FUCKING ELEVATED.
Me either! Fuck yeah, 12th and something. 12th and hamburger stand.
i feel like a thai whore the morning after the navy left.
i just watched kanye west and taylor swift have a chugging contest. why cant halloween be every day
there are certain things about getting into a cab to go home at 630 am that make me feel like a prostitute.
Well then I realized I had a bigger problem when I woke up a long board.
I'm concerned you might be passed out on a random rooftop right now. Not concerned enough to do anything about it. Hope you're alive. Goodnight.
How many folks do you know who bring coke to a dinner party. Seriously.
There's a wake for a coworker on 420 during te time of 420... Hoping everyone will be too sad to notice how high I am.
We were thinking he might be gay. Like how the fuck do you not even make out with a girl that made you a grilled cheese
I can feel his 12 year old sister"s eyes barreling into my soul everytime I'm at there house..some how she knows I'm cheating on her brother or she's mad cause I stole her shirt.
I deleted his number so I had to go into my old voicemails which are saved through my gmail and search his name... Never underestimate the resourcefulness of a drunk girl on a mission for dick
I hoped the great care he put into rolling a blunt would translate to my vagina.
I mean, except for the part where I was vomiting up pineapple and hot sauce, it was a really fun time.
Pssh I just bang a girl in a single person tent. Thats like the back seat of a sedan.
I feel like I purchased a one way ticket to hell last night and its non refundable.
Randomize
