It's not real sex if he's just convulsing inside of you.
Do you remember puking up your retainer into the toilet and putting it right back in your mouth?
You never did explain why you were in wal-mart with a wok full of popcorn.
In my drunkeness I was planning how to throw up without my parents hearing. I was gonna go for a "run" and just throw up outside.
You can do it. What doesn't kill us just drives us to drink
Jesus christ it's been two texts and we are already talking about dildos
What happened with the girl wasn't a gay thing. It was just a mutual respect and want for sex. The guys just weren't there.
Call it what you want. You fucked a girl.
I don't think I can recall what a 23 year old cock felt like if one slapped me in the face.
im lying in bed trying to choke myself out because being awake hurts too much
It wasn't even dirty talking, it was more like the soothing gentle nonsense noises you make when you've spooked a horse.
I just drove by a stop sign that had a used maxi pad stuck to it WHAT THE FUCK
My mom has had 5 shots of fireball today and she's still functioning normally... She's just extra polite.
I'm still laying in bed cuz I don't feel like adulting yet
You know, you could always move. Lol somewhere without gators, water moccasins, and Marco Rubio.
How did the test come back?
I've never been so happy to have a yeast infection. And i got a free pack of birth control
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