nut hugger
Free beer happened. I got hammered and aaron did his first keg stand. Then went all martha stewart on redecorating the bathroom. I remember being at walmart
What theme did he decide on for the bathroom?
Well as you know martha loves the northeast this time of year. I believe the theme was 'coney island' decorrated with hot dogs and macaroni
either my laughing turned him on, or he wanted to shut me up. either way, i dont care. it was amazing.
they are using this drunk girl like a spin the bottle in the hot tub, whoever she lands on she makes out with.
I feel like strippers are like dogs, the more you show you're terrified the faster they come at you.
Hahahahahahhajahahahahajajjajahjahahajahahajajahahahajjajajahahjajajajajahahahajjjajajaahhahhahahahahahahahaha dominos taxi
Found out it was only pneumonia. We celebrated hydrocodone cough syrup. Two long island ice teas at lunch and the random white powder we found in her purse. Mother of the year award.
to instagram or to not instagram the picture i took of when i shit in the urinal
She's in the bathroom. Literally just told me she could make a guy cum using just her words. Not bad for Sunday brunch.
Dude, chad is laying across the room, violently, passionately, pornographicly eating something and I seriously think the 'some thing' is fighting back.
took over 12 bombs tonight and we still aren't hooking up. Wait how am I functioning
Just traded a shot of whiskey for a warm PBR on public transit. It's that's sort of night already.
Since Josh is going to be Carl Sagan for Halloween, he bought a turtleneck and sportsman jacket. It's all my nerd fantasies come true.
Duuuude someone spilled hot sauce all over the floor and trailing outside wtf
OH GOD IT'S BLOOD. THIS IS ALOT OF BLOOD.
I think I blacked out after I decided drinking alone on the trailered jetskis was a good idea
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