I hraet yuo
did you say you heart me or hate me?
who is this?
Alex texted me. Bootycall boy #2. its like an alarm goes off once i'm single that the line is open again
Bisexual people are plain selfish.
Thanks for holding onto me so I didn't fall in my pee in that parking lot. You're the best boyfriend ever.
She was asian and in a relationship... my two weaknesses
The woman in front of me has a completely clear purse. I can see everything. It's ballsy because her vagisil is on display.
His new job just became new places to have sex at.
Things are burning & the world smells of peanut butter. It's beautiful.
we broke up because he couldn't handle the fact that i've slept with more girls than he has. also, i've slept with the girl he's seeing now.
His idea of role playing was him wearing the halloween mitt romney mask while I gave him head
Everyone else in class agrees the weed smell is coming from me
You know it's been awhile when the imagery of fucking AT A DENNY'S gets me really turned on.
I threw up in a pringles can. how do you think my night went.
You're about wine.
Yes, I'm like 90% wine at the moment
cant one of your roommates drive you?
You came in my eye once. You owe me.
ill be there in 20
Randomize
