Potential corruption. He's 19.
Get them while they're young!
I'm currently googling how to make a dress out of a trash bag. It's going to be a great night.
he is fucking friends with his exwife on facebook, but he defriends me after 3 dates? am i that crazy?
i just deleted quailman, hot hawaiian dude, appalachian swimmer, and connecticut from my phone
Passed out for 3 hrs til now to wake up naked on my bed covered with grass from drunk slip and slide I would call that success
Who was that couple sleeping in your bed with us last night?
My roommate's all sad and is crying and the chick I want to bang is in the room and Nic Cage is on fire. What the fuck.
Woke up and there was a kayak in the pool. Are you alive?
Why is there a keg in our kitchen? I'm not complaining but why is there a keg in our kitchen?
Today is definitely a "stand over the toilet and pee through the opening at the bottom of my boxers" kind of day.
I guess the silver lining is that having a big dick really comes in handy when you're hungover.
It's a mixed blessing.
It was a blind-side dick pic.
You're his holy grail. The moment he finally gets you to orgasm he'll probably just retire and become a monk.
if people come over to pregame will you hide my Oreos
I can't really feel a difference, so essentially I paid 60 bucks to bedazzle my vag.
There were no words. I got in his car, took my pants off, threw my shirt out the window, and got things started. After we were done I collected my clothes, gave him a kiss, and crept back into my house.
You're like the sex ninja. How doesn't he love you?!
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