Just wanted to let you know that if you need my services as a male dancer for his birthday, let me kno so I can clear my schedule
his penis looked like arnold from hey arnold. it was interesting.
I'm on a mission to free the leash kids. Like liberating the Israelites from Egypt. Only better.
you were on all fours yelling at the earth to stop spinning.
He considered it romantic when he told me mid-blow job that no matter what happens, he will "never forget how good of a dick I suck". Verbatim.
if things do not go as planned you should see me walking down I81 blindfolded and pantless
You talked about giving to sperm banks on a first date. What did you expect?
Post-sex nachos deserve a song.
I want you to get your positive energy all over me. I want to to look like something from Ghostbusters.
We had sex to beyonce's "drunk in love" and then he order me pizza. It was perf
This girl invited us back on the promise of weed and strudel...she delivered neither.
It's dollar drink night and I have my honors society initiation tomorrow. Somehow I think this will not end well.
We kind of crashed their funeral party. Oops.
LMAO. Stop. Men are such gentleman these days. I woke up with no one beside me and you got 6 cents
6 cents and no orgasm 💃🏻🎉
We are so blessed
I'm still mad from all the stupid shit he's done this week that even though I couldn't give two shits about Vday, I'm gonna throw an epic tantrum if he doesn't morph in to Nickolas Sparks for a day
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