no more hot dogs for you........
fine no more vajj for you
there's a guy here who looks like a hipster got a hold of obama and gave him a makeover.
She said she couldnt do it today but shed make it up to me next week
stick it in her butt and if she asks, say that thats what you thought she meant
there's a guy on campus handing out business cards. you pay him to see if your girlfriend will cheat. the company name is "tying up loose ends"
I must say your penis is just as photogenic as you
I already apologized. And I got cum in my eye in return, I say your night beats mine...
Outta milk. Using rum instead for pancake mix. Drunk Thursday is a gooo
we came up with a wnba drinking game. take a shot every play that you could've done better. won't make it through 1st quartar
You said you couldn't use your body anymore so you made me push the buttons on your phone while you made alien sound effects
That guy was drunk and couldn't get it up so he just tried to scissor me.
No other way to put this but the dick was not worth him crying for an hour after. No more online hookups.
I was basically just fingering myself and thinking about space.
you just won the triple crown of sex! your prize is more sex.
God specifically crafted these hands to deal out orgasms.
she keeps trying to brush her hair with leaves and insisting she's not high
Randomize
