woke up this morning with "hah" written on my penis.i was like wtf?? morning wood kicked in and found out what it really said, haNNah.then i remembered.
well we are all hammered and my parents are reminiscing about all the times they drove us home drunk from Christmas
i don't even specifically remember last night, it's just one big wonderful lesbianic blur.
He started to notice that i sleep with every girl he calls dibs on.
Can I have my ID back now or are you using it to crossdress again?
I think our camping neighbours like us. We're the drunk girls trying to chop firewood with no pants on at 3 in the afternoon.
The port-a-pottys are knocked over so I have nowhere to sleep.
There's nothing like telling your girl to hold your pants while peeing on your neighbors door
I haven't even sucked a boob is 6 weeks I hate not college
Is there a polite/non-lush way to ask how alcohol ranks on their list of priorities? Because like idk how to break the ice furreal.
Do you wanna do something, or just stare at each other and fantasize about death like we usually do
Tomorrow night, I am putting you In my trunk. No excuses we have waited forever for this.
Update: tequila girl had her hand down groomsmen pants
Sitting across the table from one of my high school teachers who hasn't seen me since I was about 16 drinking a beer wearing a leotard
Oh, do you remember telling everyone you were with that your vagina was angry last night?
Randomize
