Well, I didn't bring a notebook or any paper to class. Should I take notes on the sugar packet, lace thong, or condom wrapper that instead are in my school bag?
Well if it makes you feel any better I threw up at Roadhouse. And then on the way to the train. And then in a water fountain. And then in a plastic bag on the train.
whatever. i don't care. i just want to be drunk wrapped in an american flag.
The main two things I remember from last night is you "spanking Katey into reality" and watching her barf in terror.
I just had a contest with the toilet to see who could hold their breath longest.
I won
You come home the day the world is supposed to end. Well played Mayans.
I'm tellin ya, let the nipple get some air, they'll hire u on the spot, lawyers love a little nip
I have a to do list for the summer and thing one is figuring out my sexual orientation
Apparently I pulled that girl's number while I was trying to insist my drivers license had enough money on it to cover the tab.
As I took my shirt off he commented on how great my boobs where. I responded with "thanks, I grew them myself"
The night's not a success unless at least 60% of participants wake up with bite marks on their genitals the next morning.
I don't know what kind of parties you go to, but we should hang out more often.
I woke up with my converse still on and a plate of pasta next to my face, if that gives you any indication of how my night went
Hey mike is locked out, sleeping on the common room couch, no idea where his pants are nor does he know where he is. When you get this let him in? And let me know ur alive too!
Just because you got dumped by some loser doeant mean you need Jesus. It just means you need better friends and some booze
Nothing personal but yes I would be suspicious If I saw 3 guys and 2 girls in the same bathroom stall together
Randomize
