have you seen my purse? i cant find it and my ipod is in there and that shit totally cost more than my abortion.
I don't even remember his name...i'm just gonna save it as birthday sex
is it possible for your nipples to fall off? if so mine might. they hurt so bad...
nothing like celebrating the fact that you're not a father by trying to impregnate other women
my mom just told me its unladylike to have toothpaste stains on my clothes all the time.. if she only knew.
She played chubby bunny with our cocks.. She got 4
Resolution for 2011: blow jobs are a privilege, not a right.
I'm legit concerned I might pass out this weekend from having too much sex.
I know. I need to get a vagina tranquilizer.
BEHOLD THE MORNING PIGEON
SANCTIFY THE CHALK TADPOLE
THERE IS NO SOBRIETY. ONLY ZUUL.
Holy shit, I just successfully took and sent a boob pic AT MY DESK I have conquered an entire new level of skill.
just wanted to eat pizza off his dick so he let me and he can never forget it
I feel bad for her. If you sacrifice and have a chubby husband I feel that you assume he's not going to cheat on you....
My dog just ran downstairs with my vibrator in her mouth... during my dad's birthday dinner.
you missed a good time last night.
you texted me at 10 telling me to come fuck you, that says enough.
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