You blewit but ill be back in laekciew tonigthso calll mee
dude i woke up in a pile of chocolate chips. this has to stop happening
This is one of those situations that make me think to myself "what life decision did I make to get here"
seriously who else gets carried home puking from a fucking mary kay party?
You know i think she's just using me for sex
I hate you.
i no longer feel bad for not doin my schoolwork. im watching a porn in french. this MUST qualify as studying.
i licked icing off his dick. in front of his sister.
Dont act like I'm the only one that gets on a plane and picks out the one im gonna have fuck if we have time before the crash
Found plan b box covered with blood. In kitchen sick. Pickle jar is empty. Wtf happened?
It's ok, I like adventure. Just ask my vagina.
Lets just say...I plan on being a bigger shitshow than Miley Cyrus at the VMA'S
How don't you remember..? You were getting handfuls of skittles out from our bra screaming TASTE THE RAINBOW.
I fucked that choir dude last night. he had the most strangely musical moans. it was like a Sound Of Music porno.
Quit giving me a hard time, whens the last time you got head every night? Cougars are where its at they dont play games
Do thigh high boots and a ball gag count as a costume?
Randomize
