I felt like helen keller
But she could have totally found that shit before me
I was staring at you from my window across the quad. I wanted to let you know so it's not creepy
just convinced brandon semen are bugs that crawl in your pants and make gooey juice. now hes convinced he has them lmao
next time a party gets busted lets get a group photo first.
Dude the animal human society told us we could get a dog when we came back sober. I cant wait.
I got stoned in my snow covered car and pretended I was burried alive
I got shot at today. If that doesn't get me at least a blow job I give up working on the south side
Did you find any other hidden treasures in my room? Specifically weed? Or Slim Jims?
Well am going to a strip club before sun down, I dont think anything good can come from that.
All those movies are bullshit, there is no way to run down a line of parked cars, they`re too far apart. my faces hurts so much right now
Yeah I was thinking something along the lines of "I almost died, lets celebrate with sex. Come over"
Well, maybe we can talk about it over a drink and some crushed up vicodin.
When breakfast is a rum &coke at the office Christmas party you know it's gonna be a good day
Leaving the puke on the ceiling as a reminder.
I kinda just want to steal him and keep him forever
Randomize
