u cheatin on me?
if i did i would try to upgrade babe.
I didn't notice until this morning that he had a six inch RAT TAIL...
Woke up un the hot tuv. Climbed out fo the hot tub and fell asleeo. Woke ip again in the hot tub.
I took the chef home. His dick even tasted like garlic
I do. There's a bald headed guy whose kinda hot. I might rub his head. I've only had 2 beers
Dude I really need to stop drinking. I chugged a whole bottle of ketchup last night.
Join us. We're on the roof drinking breakfast
Yaaaayyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy! It has more than one y so my intentions to sleep with you after the drink special ends are clear
I actually want to work out for some reason... I think it's my brains way of telling me it doesn't like living in a fat body.
Face washed and sleeping pill taken. Here's hoping for a more sex filled tomorrow.
I ditched my one night stand in the hotel lobby. How did he add me on Snapchat?
did i just pee glitter
We just had a contest for who has less of a gag reflex...I am sad to admit that my mother won.
Omg I'm having dinner at chilli's with a guy who is arguing that getting a weed leaf tatoo on his neck will prevent him from getting a job as a dental assistant
Well that actually sounds reasonable
She climbed in my window blew me and left. She's in my phone as the blow job fairy
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