we made out on top of his cat.
U sang "shots, shots, shots" then walked 2 ur top drawer and threw socks everywhere singin "SOCKS, SOCKS, SOCKS!"
Taking my tights off outside the club to give them to the homeless man was my contribution to humanity. The fact that it was snowing just made me feel like superman.
There is a girl on the metro with no shoes and she's using a Crown Royal bag as a purse.
Sometimes you just need a break, and sometimes you also need to get stoned on these breaks. I sound like some kind of fucked up mr rogers when I say shit like that.
Get caught with marijuana. Cop takes piece. Buy new bong. Circle of fun.
Woke up in my underwear and Christmas sweater. Only. Eggnog has won the battle but not the war.
You kept mumbling that you could become one with the carpet as you proceeded to give yourself the worst carpet burn I have ever seen
being sober in physics class makes me realize the regularity with which i show up to it still drunk
i really need to shower, but i don't want to take off my bra and lose my cleavage. the struggle
If I just skip sleeping, does hangover still happen? Gonna try it. Will report back. StTAND BY
This is what happens when you leave: I get all vulnerable and I make out with the cowboy to shut him up about Jesus.
it wasnt that bad
you tried to climb into my fireplace while screaming TO DIAGON ALLEY! we didnt even watch harry potter. it was bad
Want to have dinner and we can talk about how my vagina can make you feel better?
remember that party we went to sophomore year where we found that girl and had the orgy? Im totally at that house right now.
Randomize
