Considering the face that your still in jail Im gunna go with no.
sooo i think when i get back from rothbury i should probably take a pregnancy test
but you would be showing by now. i'd just save the money and wait for a large crap in 6 months that starts crying. then you'll know.
I guess what I'm trying to say is you've fucked more people than the economy.
I have show me your genitals stuck in my head. Except in spanish. Muestrame tus genitals. Tus genitals.
i'm gonna start putting 34DD under other qualifications on my bartender applications and see if that helps
ok so I'm texting you now like I promised instead of drunktexting aaron and telling him how badly I want his cock tonight. aren't you proud?
this is Aaron, hi
I don't know, I don't really wanna ask the question, "Mom why am I not circumcised?"
i just kept saying he was red & i was blue and we couldnt become purple. I started crying at one point
Fuck at this point id do just about anything for 20 bucks
That has been your downfall in past encounters with 20 dollars bills
Why didn't I see you last night!?
We made out like 4 times....I think I saw you.
one of the RAs is here. he told me his name is optimus prime and then took his shirt off and fell down
Eye surgery went well. Just can't believe it took getting lasers through my eyes to temporarily stop the vivid sex dreams I was having
So mom called me from the hospital laughing her ass off. Apparently my sister is allergic to cocaine...
My roommate just google searched "cumming blood" using my laptop. Her boyfriend is in her room, she looks scared. Words cannot explain how hilarious this is.
You left your pants here again. 4th time in a row. How can you walk home without pants?
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