How do I get over judging people who I would be exactly like if I had a boyfriend
Get a boyfriend
he quoted Bring It On. It's over.
just accidentally masturbated with tiger balm. best. accident. ever.
I'm partying with my neighbors right now, and by "with my neighbors" I mean they are partying in their backyard and I'm partying in mine, and by "partying" I mean I'm sitting here alone drinking tequila.
From what I remember, he had one ball. But it was cute
Its great. Every time she starts barking i know ive got approximately 37 seconds to hide my gf in the closet and throw some clothes on
Idk. Last year there was an ice luge, glow in the dark jungle juice, and lots of naked people. I feel like I'll get pregnant just thinking about going to that party.
in case you were wondering, even a BJ under a blanket on the back of a bus only lifts a 14-hour bus ride to borderline tolerable.
We had sex on a lawn chair while fireworks were going off last night. It was unavoidable that I got mosquito bites all over my ass
The guy behind me is talking about how his life goal is to use his knowledge of mathematics to make the world a better place. My only life goal right now is getting through this lecture without throwing up in my lap.
Senior week was like trying to herd cats. Very drunk cats.
Dont worry, the Canadians are more afraid of you then you are of them.
I don't get a "my roommate is fucking you" discount?!
well I ran around the park drunk with a plastic baby and fell, all while screaming "I WILL PROTECT YOU CARLOS", yeah there's video
I had to cum in my sink.
Randomize
