Drinking in an igloo changes everything.
sometimes you have to go after what you want
true. and i really want to cum
No, he's fine. He only wanted to know why there were traffic pylons in the living room and how the peanut butter got on the ceiling.
Howd you meet this guy?
I found him next to my pants on sunday morn.
How did the whale quest end up? I saw u hit a little snag when the first one heard you call her that.
I legit had to pull him off my car. Then he texted me saying 'take me places.' Shotgun getting that drunk tonight
Johns diaper came in the mail. He's freaking out thinking there's some conspiracy going on since he sharted on the drive home from st. Louis
I'm mentally preparing my vagina for this semester. It's fucking welcome week. I'm going to be talking to her all night.
No, i will not have sex with him again. It felt like he was trying to bulldoze his way through me. My vagina is on strike.
All I could think when I saw it was, "All right, Vagina, only one of us is getting out of this alive."
He barged in the room with no shirt on, all fucking ripped with a half keg under one arm. Sara now calls him Bronan the Beerbarian
The guy at the door just stared only at my boobs and said "I'm gonna let you in." 'Merica
This is not the first time I've recognized my body is subconsciously trying to make pizza.
I learned a valuable lesson about combining day drinking with malt liquor: you may think you have super powers, but that's just the Steel Reserve talking.
I mean the power was out what was I supposed to do
Randomize
