does it bother you that i swallowed like millions of your unborn children
actually, i try not to think about it
and i pooped them out
Her underwear doesnt even match. If youre going to be a face book whore at least have matching shit.
She tased me when I walked in the door. Thought I was trying to steel her weed.
just asked if they'd gift wrap go-go taquitos for you at 7-eleven
Hey, hey, hey, hey. This is a hurriCAN.
You better be Eskimo Brother-ing the FUCK out of tonight right now. Long distance 'balls deep' high five
did you see me getting spanked by that lady cop who was a guy?
I just farted and its sounded like it was disappointed in me.
You screamed at oncoming traffic , "five dollars to punch this guy in taint!".
Preparing for the bar exam has made my whatever disorder you said I have act up again
Okay so the couple who keep propositioning people for threeways are def siblings not bf/gf
So are you gonna do it or no you said they're hot
I was on top for a full on make out when in dead silence "I'm moaning Myrtle" came from the TV. Moment ruined. I got cock blocked by a fictional ghost
Why were u walkin around mc with a toilet bowl lid handcuffed to u and carrying a stuffed Teddy bear last night?
Well I hate to admit it but at this point I can successfully say i have been pee'd on by both of my roommates.
I've got two reasons for you to come over later and one of them is pierced.
Randomize
