So I had sex with him again. He's still got it. Not chlamydia, he got rid of that.
We just had the worst moment of our late twenties.... We just realized we are too old for the real world
It's not called being bisexual its called making out with anyone that has a mouth
yeah. pants. i need to put pants on. i didn't do that last night. big mistake
Just watched a guy puke off his bike. Beyond impressed. He didn't even swerve
Sorry 4 leaving u in the dumpster last night
I wanna throw up and cum in that order
I am literally the only girl who can black out and wake up pantsless and STILL be 99% sure I didn't get any.
That girl is nothing but trouble. She's 40% red hair and 60% daddy issues.
Almost there.
define "almost". like I have enough time to watch a youtube video or oh shit, put on some goddamn pants because they're in the driveway.
So I found a skull ring inside me this morning. I'm assuming its yours, so I'll leave it in my mailbox for you - it looks expensive.
Just told some little girl not to judge me as I brushed my teeth in the target bathroom
There is a cooked ham in the washing machine.
Apparently i disappeared and no one found me until the morning , but i have fifty missed calls
Could’ve gone my whole life not seeing a man snort coke off another man’s cock... but there it is...
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