Crying babies in a bar. Really?
And she just changed the baby's diaper on the table. It's killing the beer garden.
Yes but life is bad with poopy sheets
she carries around a jar of peanut butter. "just in case".
You are the worst kind of disappointment. The responsible kind.
If I had a penis, I would stick it EVERYWHERE. I don't know what these guys are doing.
I was handcuffed to a girl for half-an-hour. And I'm still the only one in the house who didn't get laid.
What's up with the fire hydrant in the laundry room?
Found a popcorn kernel in my pubes... Time fir a Brazilian
I mean, I already put pants on today. We're already halfway there
We were getting fries and you hopped the counter and yelled "WELCOME TO GOOD BURGER HOME OF THE GOOD BURGER" and threw up
Somehow i instagrammed my acceptance letter while blacked out. Then my grandma was the first to comment on it. I got over 50 likes....Phd here I come....
So what other shows do you masturbate to? Or is it just friends
I barfed on the cat last night. Just wanted to share.
Plus we had to have sex before the game because there is a good chance we won’t be speaking for the rest of the week. #ironbowl
you yelled, puked and cried then passed out in the fetal position in your underwear
Randomize
