your profile still reads that you like women...interesting? I think there is some photography and video that will show otherwise
Women are like Alzheimers patiens. You can compliment them a million times in a day, but the next day is always a wash, you have to start all over.
I don't know if it's her mysterious past or atrocious grammar, but I think I'm in love.
I don't want to eat him, he probably tastes terrible.
If i spent $300 & took that thing home i would hate myself today.
This is now the friendly bartender typing for him. He wants to be on you. He is going to "destroy your vagina". Good luck and sorry if this woke you up!
I found a bag of weed while packing. Now packing is like creating tiny universes inside of boxes.
He went THROUGH MY PHONE (he's 30 for God sake) then asked me why I was stringing along 12 guys... I told him he could have just asked me if I was banging other people and then saved himself from looking at pics of dicks bigger than his.
Got serenaded to on the streets of Denver...the song was about a young banana that made really big decisions, got stds, and joined a gang. I think I like Colorado
Did you know there is a guy on the porch, wrapped in your snuggie, singing no woman no cry and drinking wine coolers?
I threw up this morning to Silent Night playing in background. It was actually quite soothing.
The only downside to doctor sex is that getting choked with a stethoscope leaves marks.
I've had more orgasms than showers this week.
Hey I'm trying to get back with my ex I'mm done doing whatever we were doing I hope things workout for you
Weird flex but ok.
I don't know who's idea it was to get wine for a frat party but my poor pitiful hung over self really fucking hates them.
Randomize
