Memo to the bitch sitting across from me at Swamp: no one thinks you're classy with your Louis Vuitton and your Burberry scarf when you're dragging on that cig like it was the last cock on earth and you needed cum for sustenance.
Adam has been drinking
Who has his phone
Adam does
nothing as in nothinggggg kills the mood for me is when a girl with 4 cm nipple hair
Yeah she is in it for the money, wait til she finds out i am broke and the sex doesnt get better
i have a "get your shit together" dinner with my parents tonight. After that ill be down to party
For the first time ever I'll be using my lunch break to pass out cold on my desk. We've gotta stop having these late night drinking things on Sundays
On a scale of 1-10 how seriously are we considering being sugar babies?
I'm about a 7.95
Is it bad that I don't ask for names anymore? Just added "gold-chain-wearing hotel guy" to my list under "minivan 3way" and "funny-tasting gym guy."
It's Wednesday. And it's about that time to remind everyone that my priorities from last weekend have not changed moving forward into this weekend.
I just crashed on my couch and have no intention of ever getting up again
I will be over with a bedpan and beer
Just made a diving catch to save a handle of Fireball falling out of the car. ESPN worthy.
well at least you got laid last nighT. I woke up on a pile of laundry
Theres a woman here with grey hair that im pretty sure i would have sex with
Whoever was the bastard/bitch/genius who duct taped my keys to my dick so I wouldn't lose them. I hate you.
Hey, sorry I choked you last night... I was just really excited to see you.
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