Idk. We dropped acid and Kevin ran away again. We didn't find him for like 3 hours.
Man I wish I had been there
Yah we found him in the pool shed of some elderly couple. They were on the porch watching all of the shenanigans. ...To be young again.
considering i was high when my dad made me pee in the cup i might fail this one
I've spent more money on drugs for bonnaroo than my actual ticket. Proudly.
Just me. You're probably having sex with her right now, so here's a reminder that you should be thinking of me per our agreement.
And for those of you keeping score at home this is the 7th time I've found Casey passed out head first in a bowl of chips at a party I didn't even know she was at
And please let him know I don't normally go off on long rants about feminist theory. That was totally the vodka talking.
My mom comes home from her weekend with her lesbian co-workers and asks "You wanna know how I got these bruises?" I've never been more torn about anything EVER.
Did I really just send a work email with cum instead of come? feck me
We could put on there: "Drink jager bombs and do stupid shit faster, with more energy!"
Moral of the story: fuckboys never change
I need to hire someone full-time to slap food and dick away from me.
Ever find a porn video so groundbreaking you mentally cancel all your Dick Appointments for the week?
I don't know who he was but he was covered up with a shower curtain and ate a whole bottle of tums
I accidentally just texted my dad asking if he wants to do shrooms with me. Do I leave the city now or...
I brought coffee but not enough for the naked guy on your porch
Randomize
