i hate sounding clingy, but i just wanted to verify i wasn't an asshole in your mind
stuffed animals make me feel really maternal.
I just pulled the condom that i lost on tues out of me at work ewwww!
Spaghetti and Car Bombs, good idea or what will end up on the bar in a few minutes?
I'm ready for my liver to be the last casualty of 2009
It didn't go so well. He got drunk and asked my dad if 'front or back' virginity mattered more.
On the bright side, at least we arent the generation raised by fucked up teen moms.
we found you under the sink... we opened up the doors and you told us to go away because you were playing indian in the cupboard
Coming out of the blackout mid beej was nice. Seeing her face was not.
If by date you mean washing Pizza house down with a bottle of wine, then yes I have a date.
I wish the guy I was sleeping with wasn't on house arrest.
You are hereby uninvited from future Turnt Tuesdays until further notice.
WHY WOULD YOU SWIPE RIGHT???!!!!!
The same reason I ordered and ate almost an entire pizza last night
I didn't even know his name until he texted me the next day and told me I should take a plan B pill. Thanks Danny.
It's difficult to focus on bonds when you know your classmate peed in your mouth
Randomize
