I no longer want to be the gay that plays in the revolving door at RelationshipDale's like a seven year old with a.d.d.
What do you say about some mid-afternoon anal?
you made me have a moment of silence for the half of a sub sandwich that you dropped on the floor earlier
Good lord, they've set up every firework to be ignited by a trail of gasoline at midnight. God save us all.
You just kept insisting that you and the homeless man went way back, and that you bonded over how cold you both were.
He started a convo with me by saying that we went to high school together and then recommended I try meth.
Youre having a picnic
Yeah but all we have is vodka, so it's getting a bit out of hand.
These cutoffs are too tight but my ass looks like Freedom
I went to the strip club tonight. I had never gone, and in a panic I gave the dancer giving me a lap dance a handshake and introduced myself. Redefines business casual.
He's going to wonder why I have burn marks on my asshole
I was going to say that I wasn't sure how that happened... but then I remembered that I bonded with the Australians over vitamins and INXS and they bought me tequila.
Are we DOING anything for lunch...if sex is involved, let's just be straight forward and stop wasting the first half hour! We just need to get to the point
Well. I think my red tank top is jinxed. this is now the second time it's gotten jizz on it.
last night I mixed vodka in with my protein shake... and you tell me my new years resolution was impossible
so he'll eat food out of a dumpster but he won't lick your ass?
Randomize
