Anal astronaut?
Wow word travels fast.
I'm just looking at Lindsay Lohan's vagina.
Oh yea! I was just doing that too!
Michael Jackson had a heart attack when he found out boyz to men was a music group not a delivery service.
Dude, you posted a cap of a porn to survey if it looked like me. That's pretty certifiably creepy.
he showed up at my house with a hand-stiched sweater that said "girlfriend?"
stalking is really helping my grade.. I followed him to a review session tonight
$150 bar tab covered by these tits. That's now the going rate. Keeping my bra on during sex unless i see the Benjamins.
Tried making out with pop rocks in my mouth. That shit is magical.
He let him chew on his fu man chew. The man has the patience of a saint
Like wrapping my dick in silk, wrapping that in velvet, and putting it in a cloud. A warm, tight, wet cloud.
I took so my adderall all I can do is lie on my floor and stare too hard at my hedgehog. He has 42 spines in the dark spot on his shoulder btw.
I accidentally mass texted his dick pic. Not only to my friends, but to my dad as well...
He just showed up in boxer briefs and loafers with only his phone and condoms
You better not fucking die before we have sex while you blow fire. I'm serious. Don't mess up my sexual bucket list.
So do you guys remember Danny from Tinder?
Sorry I only remember personality traits, not names.
Randomize
