you pissed in a zip-loc bag and wanted 60 dollars for it
bro i finally banged her last night on our basement couch
I'm at this frat party right now and yelled "my little 16 year old brother finally lost his virginity." They gave you a standing ovation
Just made nachos out of string cheese and sunchips and laying in my bed watching babay einstion..get on my level
Her life is proof that being a drunken slut will get you places.
I want a bunch of melted cheese. or a penis. or a penis covered in melted cheese
Please explain why there is a video of you peeing in the Taco Bell bathroom on my phone? Also why did you wink at the end?
He said he would pay my bar tab if he couldn't answer my question. He lost to the age old question of our youth. Why did pogs go out of style.
We're following a guy carrying a door for beer pong at his place..join us when you are deemed sober enough to leave the hospital.
No but I was fuckin done when I realized my acrylic nail caught fire when I was hitting the bong.
Notice how both of our plans for hooking up with these guys involve getting them drunk?
Oh my God, we're like men but with great boobs.
They just broke the window so they could get in and smoke the taxi driver out...
You would think by the size of the lump on my ass that I would have remembered falling down a flight of stairs.
...I just melted into my bed. I am one with the bed. I am 600 thread count.
I blacked out in the cab last night... Cant remember getting in the front door, also i got into bed with my grandma.
I dont think you understand. A NOODLE FELL OUT OF MY VAGINA! I DEMAND TO KNOW WHAT YOU DID TO ME LAST NIGHT!
Randomize
