Tried killing a moth in our bathroom. Water everywhere. Don't worry about it.
New pre-game routine....wal-mart bathrooms...quality beers for free...hallelujah
New favorite sorority...they made me pancakes in the morning and welcomed back the walk of shame girls with a round of applause
It's a sign that no dudes december is about to start: I have a yeast infection.
And after getting thrown out of the frat house, getting carried up the hill for a half an hour, puking 5 times, and almost getting stopped by campus security, she still insisted he sleep with her. Gotta give her credit, even blacked she kept her eyes on the prize
. Drop what your doing. Were going to Knoxville for midget wrestling. It's the championship.we can NOT miss this.
I cNt phones. tingles in my fingles. jingles
we could do so many fantastic illegal things together. sexually and otherwise.
Hahahaha yep. You were picking up the credit card machine and singing to it in Spanish.
Fire trucks are here again. It wasn't me this time.
You took all of your clothes off and tried to seduce me and while trying to seduce me you decided you were too drunk and passed out.
Well now you know... If you can get over the awkward... The dick is 10 min away.
I just walked in on her masturbating to a social anxiety video...
I woke up with my winter coat on, next to a polaroid of me, her and a swan...so no I don't remember our conversation.
I know I drink too much cuz "ssssjllapph peneinssesss" automatically comes up in my phone now.
Randomize
