Yes, I fucked her, no she wasn't that loose, yes she caused more drama than a 14 year old girl
The musician playing at the bar just puked inside his acoustic guitar, then sang an encore performance. I love Louisa!!!!
We almost died tonight..we almost die every night. but tonight was the closest by far
Not going out tonight. And so the 25 day drinking streak ends....
They turned the water off again. Brushed my teeth with whats left from those pitchers of mojitos. So hung over i dont even care.
me neither. i remember bell pepper tequila but not why or yelling
Hahaha, I forgot about doing shots out of the bell pepper
Just bought the plane tickets. Light headed. Blood rush to clit oh god blue clit. Mayday mayday vagina down!
I just want to pat him on the head, bake him some cookies, and reassure him that, someday, he will get laid.
He was too drunk, and my mother and I ended up babysitting him. He told her I have amazing mouth skills, and that I love the "chorizo" he feeds me. All she said was "And on the list of 30 things you never want to hear about your daughter..." while gripping the steering wheel.Please just fucking kill me now.
I got really upset about missing him last night when I was demonstrating penis sizes of the people I've slept with using a tape measurer to my roommates
He had really great hair, but he told me he's been in a psych ward three times. I mean I know I'm a psych major, but that's too much.
I ate 1200 calories worth of chocolate covered marshmallows and googled why it is okay to be single forever
it's not rock bottom until you fall down an escalator on the way home from a hookup and have to have you dad come pick your drunkass up at 3am. Adulthood.
i am risking my non lesbian vagina for your needs. i better be the best friend you ever had
The work outs are working. Someone just said my body type was “Tits On A Stick”.
Randomize