So I got a little fucked up on the punch, and made out with the family friend. Which is apparently morally reprehensible. I don't get that.
She's like the pied piper of lesbians.
I'm listening to bach and watching porn,is that a sign of depression?
Quite the contrary. Sophistication.
i've met an abundance of virgins and guys who where flip flops, i thinks there's a correlation
Just bought a McDouble with a tightly rolled dollar. The lady just gave me a sad face...
I just called my mom 'Napoleon bronaparte'. I need to stop hanging out with you.
This bowl of cereal would be the size of a giant's bowl-piece. It's. that. big.
How much did you smoke??
If I die young bury me in satin. And make sure there's a taco bar at my funeral.
...I can smell the alcohol on your breath through that text
there is a hole burned clean through my text book on forestry law and I saw you walking around with a blowtorch last night. Hope you have $160 on ya...
She got drunk on the air plane and pretended to be an elephant for an hour...Atleast the kid behind us enjoyed it.
We fucked on a kid's slide, my vagina is singing praises of being used
When that wave blew your top off I heard someone yell "SPANK BANK"
As a former fat girl, that's probably the best compliment I've ever received ever!
When she's hammered the amount of alliteration that comes out of her mouth is amazing.
What can i say, my face is nice and my body is just unreal. And my beer pouring/stealing is incredible \n
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