I got fucking wesley sniped last night by that power hoe. How'd it end up on your end? Did you canoodle the stripper enough for her to agree to go to formal?
If I die today, promise to let the world know I partied.... oh god did I party
the only reason why im excited to go home for break is to finally eat real fucking food and have normal bowel movements.
You are forgiven. I sent you a picture of a pumpkin man as a gesture of reconciliation.
Where are you and who are these girls passed out on the floor?
and why are they spooning a flamingo?
they traded weed for a spot on our floor. be nice.
He referred to his cock as "The cock" like it was third party or something.
its fine. mom just made me chug a long island. and made a crying face when i balked. we'll talk tomorrow.
Doing lines of coke through pieces of licorice. Because I can
I'd say things got weird when I started doing lines of molly in the box.
The family next to you was not pleased
i still can't believe he got laid by going to the bar and handing out "cuddle buddy" application forms
In retrospect i can confidently say that the last two months of our relationship... i was only in it because i didnt wanna lose my list on his netflix account.
Most people would agree that it IS in fact slutty to give someone head for free ice cream.
I feel like I'm in a astronaut outfit like I'm a spaceman & I'm just floating around cause that's all you do in space is float and I'm floating to be in detail
Houston we have a problem
Woke up with a bed full of sand...care to explain?
Isnt is self explanatory?
I am putting clothes on to go find a brownie
In my experiences, brownies are better naked.
Randomize
