what is it about summer that misdirects my moral compass so much?
i told him i was gay. he said that gay guys are supposed to be pretty.
I am watching Grease 2 and properly learning how to apply a condom to a banana. This is a sign from God that this is the closest I will ever get to having the need for one.
as we waited for a manager to come open the door that we broke while having sex on the wall, we decided to go round two in the hallway before he came back.. god i love hotels.
at which point he tried to give himself a prince albert piercing with the stapler on his desk.
I thought it went well, but he just sent me a video of me sucking an icicle on the fire escape of his building with the caption "The ice got more than I did." Somehow I feel like I owe him a blowjob.
Girl we've come a long way since our first Brazilian wax
I have dibs on his crisis of faith.
I almost bumped into a man wrapped only in a blanket at 10 am
I was jumping over your garbage can screaming "Im a snow cat!!" ..Who wouldn't want to see that?
he's dressing as a chick for halloween. of course i'm gonna make him get his legs professionally waxed. how is this even a question?
It's a lube slip n slide down the hallway now. Details later.
He corrected my spelling during sexting.
How ya feelin sunshine?
Like a million dollars! ... That has been hit by a bus, drowned under water and beat repeatedly by a shovel.
I feel like I had a successful night. I flashed the guy at the liquor store last night for 2 free tshirts and a giant redbull.
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