I'm blazed at jack in the box and my order number is 420. I wish everything in the world made this much sense.
For those pictures, I will suffer this headache.
You are missing out on the best boobs in town right now
Came to from my blackout with native american warrior facepaint on I'm too old for this shit
The facepaint not the blacking out
Lazier than spoon feeding yourself popcorn and debating adult diapers so you don't have to leave the mentalist marathon on tv?
she's unstoppable after she starts doing shots and yelling NANNER
Fate is real! that hot chick, Megan just showed up dressed as jasmine and I'm dressed as Aladdin this is going to be cake
In other news my cocaine dealer got arrested for heaving some kid out of a fourth story window.
We are planning a drunk snapchat treasure hunt for tomorrow, and the treasure is his penis, this is a game I'm not willing to loose.
After a little too much, I decided public urination was a constitutional right.. Nearly got deported for that one
He texts me "what are you wearing" in the middle of the workday, so naturally I assume he's kidding and respond "the blood of my enemies" #foreveralone
Only you could make a reflective vest look even remotely sexy
Mom is so high she had to turn off the ceiling fan because it was going too fast and it freaked her out.
I would really like it if you guys got out of my bush
april was a good month for me, sexually...doubled my number, had a threesome, fucked a girl for the first time and two different boys in one night. there should be a medal
Randomize
