if i wake u up at 5am tmrw by coming into ur room wearing nothing but my indiana jones hat and purple socks while singing 'courtesy of the red white + blue' will u be pleased or annoyed
keep in mind this isn't open to negotiation, i'm just trying to gauge ur reaction
the other night i did but this one wasnt and it was so random. i was hooking up with this boy who wanted to roleplay and pretend to be snakes
My poor mother should have just stuffed me back up her vagina when she had the chance.
no. you can't hotbox the world.
His threats seemed pretty legit for a 6 year old
This kind of poor decision making requires a real cup, not a mason jar.
I'm doing this for my boobs. They miss him.
It was smashing those cupcakes into my face that did it. Junk food and I don't mix.
So I love how we keep introducing our friends to sex toys. It's like pay it forward vibrator edition.
Was having a panic attack, but I'm out of xanax. Substituting with vodka shots and breathing exercises. My therapist will be proud, yes?
I was paranoid that someone would jizz in my hair while I had the cucumbers over my eyes. Super-High Spa Day didnt work out.
I don't know how it happened. All I did was tell her I was impressed by her presentation. Her nail marks on my back ain't going away anytime soon.
I'm so annoyed. We're about to buy groceries for the week and at this point I'm hoping to sustain myself on pure alcohol.
So I might join you on the drunk train on the way to poor decisions.
Gonna do a few lines then clean my room so I can feel like my life is somewhat in order.
Randomize
