No, veal is cruel because they chain them down, I'm talking about free range human babys here.
you have to give me like a days notice for these kinds of things, you cant just call at 9 am and expect me to be sober
if you wouldnt have been fucking me hard and crazy like that then my bed wouldn't have broke. you owe me 600.
so you admit it was good then??
we marched down beaver avenue with lit tiki torches humming the olympics opening song.
He nailed 50 frozen hamburgers to the ceiling last night. Now there are flies every where.
No big deal, we were just two friends having sex. It's perfectly normal we don't remember. Water under the sex bridge,
We're on a cock hunt. Everything is fair game.
She just kept saying "bless your heart" to him while he cried because he came so fast. I think a Texas woman was just what he needed
I left my bra and a book at his place. He's a hot Scandinavian who is into physics and computers - had to step up my game.
It's gotten so bad I typed my will out on my phone in case it's over.
Just woke up. Naked. Under an animal pelt. With a girl. I've never met her. She's pretty naked too.
I'm just opting for alcohol abuse, ramen and cuddling with my dog for now.
He sent me a snapchat of him singing wrecking ball. Guess what the wrecking ball was. Hint: he literally came.
Guess who's the proud owner of her very own foxtail butt plug!!
I'm not getting off this floor. I love this floor
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