I just had unprotected sex with a stranger. but i did him wearing nothing but my pearls. so its classy.
Oh and I watched laurens last episode on the hills. its been an emotional day
I'm sitting in class drinking a forty out of a paper bag. No ones said anything yet. I think my professor is trying to ignore me. Better start yelling louder.
You guys seriously fuck to bieber? That's embarrassing...
Just got a lecture from Dad about how I need to be more responsible and start buying my weed in larger quantities so that i can save money. Like he was serious and kind of disappointed in me for not adapting to his method earlier.
all ill say about last night is that we tried to stop you. oh and the bus you're on is going to nashville.
Why was I handcuffed to the roof?
It was easier then trying to explain why you couldn't fly
is it bad that I didn't wash the cum out of my hair because it keeps my curls intact?
If this party got busted it would be an improvement
All I've been thinking about for the past 12 hours is sex and SEAWORLD
I think I blacked out after I decided drinking alone on the trailered jetskis was a good idea
Do I get bonus points if I get lockjaw after a cosmic blowjob?
I am a delicate flower. A fucked up, drunk, horny, pants pissing, delicate little flower.
Pornhub is actually a very wholesome website
Do you think it would be okay if i cleaned my cartilage piercing with the leftover vodka?
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