I will be home in 10 min. Dont be beating off on the couch
enter at your own risk
chicago's viagra triangle is not unlike the bermuda triangle in thatt things just get lost...... planes, ships, dignity, virginity, etc.
Someone will be leaving this trip either pregnant or devastated.
my quiz for the book was only 2 questions and my one answer was sorry and then a sad face
I like that we make it a requirement to howl at the moon every time we get drunk together.
There were 11 girls in that minivan and everyone was either puking, crying, or yelling "we're a total shit show"
Someone just got kicked out of the mall for being dressed like a giant cat. I feel like this is in your future.
I keep confusing the name of her and her dog. Both are appropriate.
You take a step back sometimes and are like "when was the last time I was sober?" or "wow I need to stop putting everything in my vagina"
Is this an intervention?
I literally ate pizza on a toilet and made up reasons as to why you should make out with that boy. I am unstoppable.
my bed is a shrine, and I am its goddess.
In the words of my step grandma "whatever makes your pussy happy"
Then his buddy called and said "my car broke down, I need a ride. If I'm not home by midnight they'll extend my house arrest." And I knew it was time to leave.
I dropped a piece of Mac and cheese in the shower and I almost still ate it. Stoned, but not stoned enough to degrade myself.
I woke up next to my bosses toilet.i wish you had just left me in the neighbors yard.
Randomize
