All I remember from my 21st is crying because the bouncer made him put his shirt back on
is pulling out brownies in the middle of class on 4/20 just too obvious?
I should not be in class today. For the professors sake.
Btw after this weekend the chipndales costume has a 125% success rate.
There's a girl in the bathroom crying about something having to do with cream cheese.
Well for number 40 i would prefer to at least like the guy attached to the dick
It's like god made him fantastic at oral to make up for what his mouth does the rest of the time.
Due to certain anatomical proportions it was less like fucking and more like childbirth.
ahhhh just came to creep and you're not there AND your thong you were wearing last night is on the floor..someone has some explaining to do
I convinced every single one of my cousins to bring me a glass of wine. I was the alcoholic queen and they were my subjects.
I'm watching the Brazzers version of Mary Poppins and enjoying it. Volume on and all. 45 minutes.
I have suspicion of morning wood.
How are you unsure as to the current state of your penis?
pray to the hookup gods
I would steal a car if I knew it had wheat thins in it
is it necessary to steal the whole car?
I just had the polyamorous Canadian hockey player do the splits while naked in a handstand at my apartment just now. And yes, I know it’s 1:30am on a Thursday.
Randomize
