I find it funny that "sexual harassment" contains the phrase "ass sex". Let me know what your thoughts are on the matter.
I am not sure how to feel about the fact that I was turned on by someone with a penis. I can't believe Lady Gaga would do this to me. :(
So can you tell me who's underwear is on the cat?
You told me that you only walk into walls because it makes the room stop spinning.
I wonder if he has realized that I have poured all if those shots he bought into the tip jar
Washing vom off hardwood, so much easier than carpet. Thank you adulthood!
He smells so good today
Seriously, back away from the sexual harrasment suit.
Haha, maybe if he wasn't dressed up like Kimmy Gibler he could give her the D
Trying to figure out what I just puked. Demon weed is salad. No more drunk buffets.
I work nights. I sleep in. I take online classes. And fuck bad bitches. I'd say those are some perks to grad school.
Look, if a guy shows up at your house. He's short, name is Logan, has weird vertical hair, let him in, give him food, and a place to stay. He's on a ver important mission. And I am he. as he is me and we are all together. And we are the eggman, goo goo gajoob.
Got an egg Mcmuffin combo, and put the hash brown in the sandwich. That level of hungover
There's a set of buzz lightyear wings in lost and found at work. I just need access to your roof.
I just bought a handle of tequila and a breakfast burrito. I might be out of money for the weekend, but at least I have the necessities covered.
it's 1043 pm. still havent changed out of the shirt i wore last night so at this point i figure i'll go for twosies.
Randomize
