She was asian and in a relationship... my two weaknesses
My boobs are too big for things to be going this downhill in my life.
I think I could pass a breathalyzer. But with like a C.
just got super drunk mixing jägermeister with my lyme disease meds. even if my face goes paralyzed, at least i got smashed from it.
Fuck. These are the symptoms I had when I was pregnant. This could be bad.
This is davidson friend mat i an drunk. Thank you for having a physical relationship. With David. I bet he gas a penis the size of an elephant tusk. You are a lucky lady.
It's probably just the physical manifestation of slut karma. But i of course mean that in the kindest way possible because i love you and respect your choices
some asshole was waslkibg around with ab electric razor and shaving parts of peoples heads.
I was living a snoop dogg song I fucked her on the floor so I wouldn't mess up my bed
She yanked on my limp dick and I yelped, to which she slurred something about starting it like a lawn mower
I suppose what I've learned from this experience is that sometimes you just have to make out with a narcissistic baby daddy to make a clean getaway.
So he just rolled you off his dick and fell on the floor?
LMAO I like how "don't worry I'll bring chasers" is your way of assuring things will be ok
This night could easily degenerate into a drunken haze of strippers and gambling, but I need a support network.
She grabbed the other one and started playing tug-o-war against the blonde chick. I told you getting my nipples pierced was a good idea
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