Feel like bed is flying. Not sure where we're going. Hope there is candy.
He sent me a video of himself jacking off. I am not kidding.
WTF??? Isn't he married??
Yeah but his wife is at a birthday party and I guess he's bored. LOL
I am 90% sure the kid in front of me in class is picking his face spots, smelling it, and then eating it. That is a LOT of % sure for something like that.
I'd say this is worse than that time when I realized that my favorite bath toy growing up was my Mom's douche bottle.
she's telling me all about the love triangles of her sims. you tell me how it's going.
I am highly attracted to the men and that's all i can say. I do not clap and make noises but i do turn to the side and say how i'd do incredible things to them if given the chance
I stumbled in at 6am to find my cat in the window making a noise I've never heard her make. When I went to the window there was a goat outside staring at us.
Are you sure? Or did you just think there was a goat?
No there was a goat. I gave it a donut.
She looked at my cock with a kind of resigned disappointment.
I will no longer accept being cock blocked in my own bed.
New carpet is nice. I'm making carpet angels. Like a fresh snowfall.
Still butthurt there's a framed picture of me passed out on the toilet in my grandparents' living room
I draw, I play three woodwind instruments, I press buttons for eight hours at work and Im studying to be a gynecologist... I guarantee I can make you squirt, babe.
I think anything that happens between 12 and 2 am is just sketchy enough to be a good idea.
You know, part of me wants to die and the other part of me doesn't want to live
He sent me a slow motion video of him jerking off...it was so long (the video not his dick) even I felt awkward watching it alone
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