you kept running across the street. everytime you made it across successfully you took something off. can't believe there were no cops around...
oh thats it?
Definitely still drunk while signing the 'responsible adult' form at the hospital
I don't care where my tongue is but i t's going to be in all the pictures.
Also, just saw a homeless man answer a phone call on a blackberry...
We hadn't had sex in so long that I started queefing and then I couldn't stop giggling... I think he's mad.
How does "I'm not drinking tonight" turn into body shots?
Ripped lines in the bathroom before my presentation.. Got bonus marks for my enthusiasm.. This is why I love drugs
I'm driving while wearing hulk hands
On Wednesday I'm putting wine in a water bottle and crashing Margaret thatchers funeral
Sorry you had to clean the sheets with your macro notes
Last night I watered my lawn and smoked a joint then cooked a steak. I'm really killing this adulthood thing.
If its not for food we ain't going out.
Saw a thong on the yellow lines of the street when I left this morning, are they yours by any chance?
We had sex then laid in his bed eating chocolate and drinking juice boxes. I think I'm going to keep him around.
My fuck it list is complete! I finally got a firefighter!
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