the night i cant remember will be the night i always remember thanks to my "i
Free body shot off of Sarah. Expires never.
listen. just hotwire a car, take off the license plate, make up a new one on a sheet of paper and go the speed limit. i do it like, at least 3x a week.
She paints her nails the color of the sheets of the last guy she slept with
And on the subject of embracing my inner whore, I had two different dicks in my mouth yesterday. Friend, it's official. I'm completely outta control.
I just did a Kegel and my back popped. My vagina is a gift to penises everywhere.
Strange request but for my birthday you should get me one of those vibrators that you can plug into your iPod that go along with the music.
I like her. She smells like old lady but tastes like whiskey
I'm currently giving my drug dealer relationship advice. He's a nice guy and all but I'm really just hoping I get some free weed
i mostly like you because you have a nice nose and that's an important trait to pass on to my future children
We should try to put a bagel on your penis
I smell like playdoh, sex, and ruined lives. I love the weekend
DAMN HIS BEARD AND ABILITY TO USE TOOLS ON A LADDER!!
You could cut the tension with my nipples.
Not even a manhunt keeps my brother and his friends from the bars
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