So the hot 23 year old i went home with last night is really 17 and was here for orientation.. i feel like a pedifile...
In that case, you should probably come up to the union, orientation is in full swing, your kind of guys ;)
cunt.
Did you know that when you swallow it's like 60 calories!?
That's okay, it's all protein anyway.
The state of Wisconsin is just irresponsible for letting me buy this many fireworks
Just invented taco cereal.
It's like the god of all feather dusters, but for your vagina
It really is the softest mustache
It's 2:30 on a Friday afternoon. It's snowing and must be about 20 degrees outside. I'm sitting in this class with 300 people using up every ounce of energy and willpower not to puke all over the girl in front of me. This has got to stop.
Got into Princeton. So excited about the mommy-issue-over-achieving-cock I get to ride the next 4 years!!!
So on a scale from 1-10 how gross is it that I used mortuary makeup on my own face?
If your night didn't end with writing a witness report for the cops at a shwarma place, your night was probably less interesting than mine.
is it wrong to hook up with someone at a memorial drum circle
Currently watching Zombie Sharks while high. This is why I love Shark Week.
No. We can't get pedicures until my toenails grow back.
Never in my life did I think i would give a blow job in the bathroom of my old elementary school. Twice.
Apparently i'm now known as the kid who was double fisting tequila and pedialyte.
I have to touch the horse lube. :-(
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