"Ever since I killed her kid she be actin' shady." Actual quote overheard at Marine World just now. Oh God.
I'd do that. But we would need storm trooper helmets.
I shaved my pubes to make my cock look like it has a lions mane. to surprise the girl that works at the zoo when she comes over.
Too late. I'm going over there. I'm a bad example for all women: Do as I say, not who I do.
just used a paint mixing cup as a shot glass. thank u art school.
I can hear my fat mexican neighbor yelling "do you like that!" ...I hope its not his dog
Maybe. This hangover is made of nightmares and that thing from the Alien movies.
We are without power. He took ALL the lightbulbs out and hid them.
I mean I'm into guys with money but more into guys I'm actually attracted to
yeah i guess i'd rather he was hot than rich
wow i don't know if that qualifies as growing up but if it does i'm all in
Not only does DQ have s'mores shakes, sonic has a hot dog in a pretzel bun, and Wendy's has a burger in a pretzel bun. Important things are happening.
Some nice lady just gave me a beer out of her purse. I love youth hockey
Nothing too major over here lately. Just had a date with an ex-internet porn star turned lawyer. He said: "at my 3rd burning man I taught a workshop on BDSM" and I knew it was going to be a fun night.
I just can't have sex in the car again. it's just too much
Probably should start having regular sex again too to lose this breakup weight. Good cardio.
my mom asked me why i was covered in scratches, blood, and dirt this morning..i answered "i was planking obviously" and walked away
Randomize