she's leaving w me bro, I've been buying her mad shots. She's seen my apt. So locked down.
i was looking up hair salons in ithaca for the wedding and one is a hair salon/ sake bar! you can have sake or champagne while you get your hair done!
question, how would one sake-bomb while getting hair done without getting a horrible haircut?
How fat would you say she has to be before I can consider this a threesome
i don't care who i fucked last night, until im at 43plus im not considering myself slutty
I'm never telling my kids not to take ecstasy, never. Idk what my mom was thinking.
Its like after 6 beers, the clap doesn't scare me anymore.
Tequila bombs in champagne seemed like a good idea at the time.
Around noon tomorrow come looking for me. I'll be on Mill wearing whatever clothes I haven't lost yet. DO NOT REPLY. DO NOT ASK QUESTIONS. JUST DO IT.
It hurts to peel the glue off my chest and i keep finding glitter in my hair.
I just wanted to decorate you...
he told me to hold it and try to write my name in the snow and it seemed like a bonding moment because neither one of us had ever done that before. i didn't anticipate it vibrating and weirding me out therefore making me let go and get my hand peed on.
After what was supposed to be a one night stand I woke up to a message in my room wall written in marker "Kaitlin got it on in here" definitely a cock block down the road
As soon as I got there, you appeared out of no where, yelled "they're giving away free cigarettes!" in my face and then disappeared and I didn't see you the rest of the night.
PS there is a naked boy in my bed and I just left for the bar...
He's got the good dick trifecta - flip phone, works outside, bed with no headboard.
I JUST WANT TO SIT IN MY UNDERWEAR AND WATCH THE BRAVES GAME AND NOT BE CONSTRAINED BY MY ED SHEERAN SHORTS
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